Culture Shock

Today I was sitting as usual, staring at the computer screen and thinking. I realised that how thinking has become an integral part of my life. All I do is think, and think sincerely of all the absolute nonsense in this world and through these nonsense comes some unusually stupid ideas for creating concepts which might turn into some kinda movie or TV show. I know there is nothing better than nonsense in Indian television right now anyways. If you are assuming that thinking nonsense is easy, then you should try and you will go crazy when all the nonsense turn into some kinda sense and all of a sudden you realise that it is a part of your senseless life which was a nonsense in the first place.

What If my name was Jignesh, imagine the life I would be leading at this moment. Instead of typing here, I would be counting money in some shop which my dad owns, wearing colorful shirts and flashing a Pulser to woo all the girls living in my colony in my free time which is after 10 pm when the shop closes, or I would be still completing my CA and working for a firm trying desperately to finally finish it this year. Imagine if my name was Harbhajan Nair, how would I be? My mom would be Punjabi, my dad would be from Kerala, I would be a joke everyday and a culture shock for rest of the people who don't get the joke.

When I was leaving for Toronto, Canada, I was told that you will get a lot of culture shock as you don't know their culture and stuff. I went their and started speaking in their accent(Thanks to HBO and Star Movies) and they were in all kind of shocks. When I told them that I am from India, their reaction changed from :-

Indian - They ride the elephants and eat monkeys (Courtesy Indiana Jones) and of course our family business was riding bullock cart, they came here and learned driving cabs. That is all we do, we shift, migrate and travel our whole life on bullock carts. Oh yeah we also dance a lot in every occasion like wedding, engagement, birth, death, riding bullock cart, peeing, while labor pains, when diagnosed with cancer or Aids, bungee jumping, or when just plain unconscious.

To

Indian - They speak better English then us and they wear clothes!!!

So anyways I was talking to a very good friend of mine about relationship and stuff. She is my favorite friend and I call her Pani Puri. We were walking and our focus went to this flower shop with new bouquets arranged exotically.

PP - I like those big petal flowers.

Me - Whats the use, it looks better on the plant then being ripped off their glory.

PP- Yeah but people have money, no time and always in rush so...

Me - So they can gift the whole plant with the flower and the kundi (Pot)

PP - When I buy my house I will have a small garden in my balcony with all beautiful plants.

We were passing by the Mandir and there was a flower shop there (gonde ke phool wala)

Me - I will get those mala if I have a girl friend on valentines day. Then take her for a cutting chai and then to a dhaba for dinner.

PP - How romantic that will be?

Me - No Instead I will take a Cauliflower. That will be flower and dinner and if she wants some chocolate then I can sprinkle some chocolate chips on the cauliflower just for that magic touch.

PP - She will leave you forever.

Me - If she doesn't then she truly loves me for who I am.

How dumb I am, I wish God had made a woman who can fall for the cauliflower trick. Nothing else but it will be easy on my pocket.

Adios